Survivor Poetry- ‘Days When It Feels Like No One’s On Your Side’

 
Days when it feels like no one’s on your side
and you have to hide
from your own mind
and the twisted
often too realistic
thoughts that control you
and push you and pull you
and all that you can do
is to pretend to
be fine
there’s nothing on your mind
thank God that most people are blind
to anything further past
the smiling mask
that you’ve crafted until at last
it’s mastered
and plastered
overtop of the broken face
takes it’s place
and you’re safe
from the world outside
but too soon you find
that the terror’s inside.
and no one can help
’cause you can’t escape from yourself
so you put it all away on a shelf
in the back of your heart
you don’t want any part
of the sickening past
but all too fast
it comes back
and attacks
and it’s hard, you soon find
to control your own mind
these voice keep screaming at you all the time
you enter a trance as if you’re daydreaming
you keeping seeing
pictures, but you can tell what’s real
and you feel
like your about to burst
cause it hurts
so much more
than words can explore

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